Friday Fax A Weekly Summary of Polywater® News of Incredible Importance | ||
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Issue #854 |
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          | In last week's issue of the Friday Fax we urged reps to metaphorically ride the woodpecker to fame and fortune with UPR Utility Pole Repair like a Na'vi warrior on a mountain banshee from the movie Avatar. Know that one Polywater salesperson takes that challenge literally. Is it a coincidence that the movie's main character is named Jake? And that Jake is a hero? I think not. Polywater's own Jake Jonnes, Central Regional Sales Manager, embodies all that is pure and righteous in the battle against woodpecker damage. Look closely at the enlarged image and you'll see that it's Jake Jonnes dominating this woodpecker. To be successful every new product needs a champion, and for UPR the product champion is Jake Jonnes. He's doing more than leading the multiverse in sales of UPR; he helped bridge the gap between the field and the lab, constantly providing crucial feedback in a two-way dialogue that helped the development team match the formulation and packaging system to the needs of the customer. Without Jake's invaluable input, the specialized UPR-NF no-flow version--now the top seller--simply would not exist. Although the HR Department has concerns about his thong, we should all worship Jake as a hero, and should at least set this image as our PC background for daily inspiration. Each of you should strive to be the protagonist in your very own UPR sales adventure tale. |
![]() The Joke |
                              | More Bumper Stickers.   1) Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them! 2) Why do psychics have to ask you for your name? 3) I intend to live forever ... so far, so good. 4) Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk? 5) What happens if you get scared half to death twice? 6) I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out. 7) Black holes are where God divided by zero. 8) All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand. 9) Taxation with representation isn't so hot either! 10) Lead me not into temptation ... I can find it myself. 11) I'm out of bed and dressed. What more do you want? 12) Pride is what we have. Vanity is what others have. 13) There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't." 14) 2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2. 15) I killed a 6-pack just to watch it die. 16) Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition. 17) He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged. 18) Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change. |
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Copyright © 2015 American Polywater Corporation -- Issue Date: 3/20/15 |
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