
	Friday Fax A Weekly Summary of Polywater^® News of Incredible Importance

Issue #849

The big East Coast blizzards of recent weeks were billed as "Snowmageddon" by meteorologists and the Chicken Little crowd in media, but they might be more accurately described after the fact as "Fauxmageddon" in some locations that were missed. But whether or not all the "hystormia" was justified this time, the potential always exists for significant snowfall throughout much of the globe at one time or another, which ultimately leads to melting, flooding, and unwanted water intrusion, placing huge investments in electrical and communications equipment at risk. The same applies for hurricanes, tsunamis, sharknados, etc.

That's why now--before all those nasty service disruptions and expensive repairs--it's time to declare "Foam-mageddon" on the problem. Foam-mageddon is an apocalyptic counterattack on the moisture-mongering storms threatening our infrastructure. Storm Hardening is the operational offensive code word. The weapon of choice is FST Foam Duct Sealant. The key sales strategy is explaining to customers that with its ability to hold 22 feet of water head pressure indefinitely, FST Foam should be an integral part of every storm-hardening action plan.

Make sure your customers safeguard their ducts with FST Foam, so when the next Mega-Winterpocalypse-Snowmageddon-Def-Con-4-Killstorm hits, they can rest easy whilst nibbling prepper food in their bomb shelter and reading old issues of NatGeo by candlelight.

The Friday Fax Editor's Joke of the Week

The Joke

Be Careful What You Wish For. A man walks into a diner with a full-grown ostrich. They sit and the waitress takes their order. The man says, "I'll have a hamburger, fries and a Coke." The ostrich says, "I'll have the same." Later the waitress returns with the order. "That'll be $16.43 please." The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change. The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and he says, "I'll have a hamburger, fries and a Coke." The ostrich says, "Same for me." Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change. This becomes routine until one evening, the two enter again. "The usual?" asks the waitress. "No, tonight I want steak, baked potato and salad," says the man. "Me too," says the ostrich. The waitress comes with their order and says, "That's $22.62." Again the man pulls exact change from his pocket. The curious waitress finally says, "Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to come up with the exact change every time?" He says, "Several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I'd just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there." She says, "That's brilliant! Most people would wish for a million dollars, but you'll always be as rich as you want!" He says, "Right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there." The waitress asks, "So ... what's with the ostrich?" He sighs and says, "My second wish was for a tall chick with long legs who agrees with everything I say."

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American Polywater Corporation -- The world's leading manufacturer of cable pulling lubricants, cable cleaners, sealants, and MRO & construction chemicals.
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