Friday Fax
A Weekly Summary of Polywater® News of Incredible Importance
Issue #844


          The Year 2015 will surely usher in its fair share of the usual signs of the apocalypse: earthquakes, volcanoes, tsunamis, hurricanes, pestilence, war, famine, meteor impacts, and Kardashian tweets. And there's not a dang thing Polywater can do about any of them.

But there's one disaster we can help with, one that's attacking our global utility infrastructure on a daily basis, threatening to shut down the grid, destroy modern civilization, and return us to the Stone Age. It's a relentless and diabolical monster known as Peckerzilla.

Fueled by an insatiable appetite for insects, Peckerzilla pokes holes in wooden power and telephone poles (it cares not which), cutting short their useful service life. These destructive holes can grow so large that they weaken and break the poles in a strong wind, forcing service outages and costly replacement.

Our very survival demands that we fight back against the pernicious beast with every tool at our disposal. And Polywater now has the best tool available: UPR Utility Pole Repair Sealant, now described in our New Polywater UPR Flyer. Join the fight to save humanity, and stayed tuned for more information on how we can use UPR to defeat this evil, including news about the exciting new UPR "No Flow" option.


The Joke
                              Engineer Joke. An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates. St. Peter checks his dossier and says, "Ah, you're an engineer ... you're in the wrong place." So the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is let in. Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements. After a while, they've got air conditioning, flush toilets and escalators, and the engineer is becoming a pretty popular guy. One day God calls Satan up on the telephone and asks with a sneer, "So, how's it going down there in hell?" Satan replies, "Hey, things are going great. We've got air conditioning, flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next." God replies, "What?! You've got an engineer? That's a mistake--he should never have gotten down there. Send him up here." Satan says, "No way! I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him." God says, "Send him back up here or I'll sue." Satan laughs uproariously and answers, "Yeah, right. And just where are you going to get a lawyer?"

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Copyright Š 2015 American Polywater Corporation -- Issue Date: 1/9/15

American Polywater Corporation -- The world's leading manufacturer of cable pulling lubricants, cable cleaners, sealants, and MRO & construction chemicals.
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