The Joke |
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How Do They Survive? 1) My phone went dead and I contacted the telephone repair people. They promised to be out between 8:00 a.m. and 7:00 p.m. When I asked if they could give me a narrower timeframe, the guy asked, "Would you like us to call before we come?" I said I didn't see how he'd be able to do that since my phone wasn't working. He also asked that I report future outages by email. My email won't work without a phone line.
2) When I signed the receipt for my credit card purchase the clerk noticed I'd never signed the back of the credit card. She told me she couldn't complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why she explained that it was necessary for comparing to the signature I'd just signed on the receipt. So I signed the credit card in front of her. She carefully compared the two signatures. As luck would have it, they matched.
3) My daughter ordered a taco at Taco Bell and asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.
4) When checking in at the gate an airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" I said, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" She smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."
5) The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with a co-worker when she asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she said, "Why on earth are blind people driving?"
6) At a good-bye luncheon for a coworker leaving the company due to "downsizing," our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Speechless, we all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.
7) A coworker plugged her power strip back into itself and for the life of her couldn't understand why her system wouldn't turn on.
8) I arrived at my auto dealership to pick up my car and was told the keys had been locked in it. In the service department I found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. Watching from the passenger side I instinctively tried the door handle and ... it was unlocked. "Hey," I said, "It's open!" To which he replied, "I know. I already got that side."
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