Friday Fax A Weekly Summary of Polywater® News of Incredible Importance | ||
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Issue #768 |
![]() 4th of July |
Annual 4th of July message, delivered in American Polywater's research lab in Stillwater, MN: Two score and no years ago my father brought forth on this continent, a new product, conceived in ingenuity, and dedicated to the proposition that all cable pulling lubricants are not created equal. Now we are engaged in a great sales competition, testing whether that lubricant, or any lubricant so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great testing ground of that competition. We have come to dedicate a portion of this laboratory, as a final resting place for those cable samples that gave their lives that Polywater Lubricants might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this. But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate, we can not consecrate, we can not hallow this lab bench. The brave cables, energized and dead, that struggled here, have consecrated it far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what those cables did here. It is for us the employees and agents, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which those cables here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us--that from these test cables we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of friction reduction, that we here highly resolve that these cables shall not have been stressed beyond their manufacturers' limits in vain, that this product, under UL, shall have a new birth of sales growth, and that Polywater Lubricants, made in the USA, for the people, shall not perish from the earth. |
![]() The Joke |
                              | A Well-Planned Retirement. Outside England's Bristol Zoo there is a parking lot for 150 cars and 8 buses. For 25 years, its parking fees were managed by a very pleasant attendant. The fees were: cars $1.40, buses $7.00. Then, one day, after 25 solid years of never missing a day of work, he just didn't show up; so the Zoo Management called the City Council and asked it to send them another parking agent. The Council did some research and replied that the parking lot was the Zoo's own responsibility. The Zoo advised the Council that the attendant was a City employee. The City Council responded that the lot attendant had never been on the City payroll. Meanwhile, sitting in his villa somewhere on the coast of Spain ... or France or Italy ... is a man who'd apparently had a ticket machine installed completely on his own and then had simply begun to show up every day, commencing to collect and keep the parking fees, estimated at about $560 per day--for 25 years! Assuming 7 days a week, this amounts to just over $7 million dollars ... and no one even knows his name. |
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Copyright © 2013 American Polywater Corporation -- Issue Date: 7/3/13 |
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