Friday Fax
A Weekly Summary of Polywater® News of Incredible Importance
Issue #665


4th of July
          Annual 4th of July message, delivered in American Polywater's research lab in Stillwater, MN:

One score and eighteen years ago my father brought forth on this continent, a new product, conceived in ingenuity, and dedicated to the proposition that all cable pulling lubricants are not created equal. Now we are engaged in a great sales competition, testing whether that lubricant, or any lubricant so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great testing ground of that competition. We have come to dedicate a portion of this laboratory, as a final resting place for those cable samples that gave their lives that Polywater Lubricants might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this. But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate, we can not consecrate, we can not hallow this lab bench. The brave cables, energized and dead, that struggled here, have consecrated it far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what those cables did here. It is for us the employees and agents, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which those cables here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us--that from these test cables we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of friction reduction, that we here highly resolve that these cables shall not have been stressed beyond their manufacturers' limits in vain, that this product, under UL, shall have a new birth of sales growth, and that Polywater Lubricants, made in the USA, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.


The Joke
                              Dog Bite. One fall day, a guy is out raking leaves and he notices a hearse slowly drive by. Following the first hearse is a second hearse, and behind that is a man walking sadly along, followed by a dog, and then about two hundred men walking in single file. The guy's intrigued, so he goes up to the man following the second hearse, and he asks him, "Who is in that first hearse?" The man says, "That is my wife." The guy says, "I'm sorry. What happened to her?" The man says, "My dog bit her and she died." The guy then asks, "Who is in the second hearse." The man says, "That's my mother-in-law. My dog bit her and she died as well." The guy says, "Hey, can I borrow your dog?" The man points over his shoulder and says, "Get in line."

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Copyright © 2011 American Polywater Corporation -- Issue Date: 7/1/11

American Polywater Corporation -- The world's leading manufacturer of cable pulling lubricants, cable cleaners, and MRO & construction chemicals.
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